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You might be a Hoosier if...

Jeff Foxworthy on Indiana

If Jeff Foxworthy had lived in Indiana, he'd probably have a routine like this...

  • If someone in a store offers you assistance & they don't work there,
    you might live in Indiana.
  • If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of
    his forehead, you might live in Indiana.
  • If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might
    live in Indiana.
  • If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who
    dialed a wrong number, you might live in Indiana.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE Hoosier WHEN:

  1. Vacation means going north or south on I 65 for the weekend.
  2. You measure distance in hours.
  3. You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.
  4. You often switch from heat to AC in the same day and back again.
  5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging
    blizzard, without flinching.
  6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events including
    weddings.
  7. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave
    both unlocked.
  8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how
    to use them.
  9. You design your kids Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
  10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled
    with snow.
  11. You know all 5 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter,
    road construction, & It's Hot.
  12. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to
    your blue spruce.
  13. Down south means Kentucky to you.
  14. A brat is something you eat.
  15. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole shed.
  16. You go out to a tailgate party every Friday.
  17. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.
  18. You find 0 degrees a "little chilly".
  19. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all
    your Indiana friends.